20 Things I've Learned By Age 20

As I sit here and type this post, there are so many thoughts rushing through my head. I have "Check On It" by Beyoncé stuck in my head, ALL my bills are sadly due on the same day, and I'm at work which is coinciding with my SVU marathon. Now I don't know if this is just a "me" thing, or if everyone my age is like this, but everything, and when I say "everything" I mean EVERYTHING is the end of the world. Adulating is just hard man, and this is only the beginning. BUT me being me, I try to look at the bright side of every situation. "Check On It" is a fabulous song and Beyoncé ROCKS. Because all my bills are due on the same day, I wont have to pay bills again for at least 2 weeks. The money I'm making at work right now will pay for my bills in 2 weeks (that is if I don't spend it all on chicken nuggets) and luckily for me I'm recording the SVU marathon as I type. My life is constantly changing. My life changes quicker than I can say supercalifragilisticexpialidocious. Knowing what I know now, my life could have probably gone a lot smoother. But for every change life has thrown me, I'm thankful for every lesson learned. Here are 20 of those lessons.

1. CHILLLLLL
Don't take life so seriously right now. You'll have plenty of time to be serious when you're in your 40's, so for now just be Chillin' out maxin' relaxin' all cool and all shooting some b-ball outside of the school. And watch The Fresh Prince Of Bel-Air :)

2. Not everyone is going to like you
And you're not going to like everyone. Its inevitable and it's okay. 

3. Go to the party
We are only in this stage of our lives for a few years, so even if the "party scene" isn't exactly you're scene, make the most of it. You only live once.

4. Skip the party
Your liver will thank you later.

5. The gossip doesn't stop
You'd be surprised how petty some middle aged men and women can be. Some people feed off gossip and drama as if they need it to survive. Get used to it, and don't feed into it.

6. Everyone grows at their own rate
Not everyone was raised the same way you were. You cant force someone to have the same mindset as you, people develop on their own.

7. The number of friends you have doesn't matter
Quality over quantity boo.

8. Don't strive to make your presence noticed, make your absence felt
Being the center of attention isn't always whats important. Don't announce your presence to make people notice you. Make them know what it feels like to be in your absence.

9. You are not your numbers
This includes your weight, your IQ level, your GPA, the number of people you have slept with, your age, your height, your salary, or the number of likes you have on Instagram. These things do not define you.

10. Become at peace with yourself
Once you do that, nothing can touch you

11. Water and Oil do not mix
...and they never will. Remember that the next time you try to force something.

12. Karma is real
It may take days, or it may take years, but I am a firm believer that karma always has its day. If you want good energy, live a good life

13. Smile at strangers
You have no idea the impact a simple smile can make on someones day

14. You don't know everything
And you never will. 

15. LEGGINGS ARE PANTS
There is no debate

16. Unfortunetly, no amount of cardio will burn a bad diet
This hurts to even type

17. Don't be afraid to ask for help
The strongest people admit when they need help, the weakest people believe they can do it all on their own

18. Stop waiting for the perfect moment, make the moment perfect
There is no time like the present to make a change

19. It's okay to not have you life together
None of us have our life fully together yet, you're doing okay.

20. Don't rush to grow up
When I was little I had this overwhelming desire to skip my younger years and just be an adult. And I wish I hadn't done that because I look back on the moments that are now just memories and wish I could experience them all over again.

Xo~ Mandy

Finding Yourself

I always say, "you get out of life what you put int it." If you constantly just sit back and either do nothing with your life,or just follow in the footsteps of someone else you're not going to get anything out of it. Branching out and exploring all the wonderful opportunities life has to offer you is one of the most rewarding and satisfying feelings. Think about it, why follow in the footsteps of somebody else, when in reality they could be the ones trying to follow in yours?

You need to be able to have an open mind about the way the world works. Not everything is going to go your way and you need to realize that and learn to be okay with it, because if not you're never going to be fully satisfied.

Be confident in who you are. Even if its about something so simple. If you always wear your hair down and your getting sick of it, throw it up for a change.Own that ponytail girl, work that up do! Whoever you are, you are AWESOME and don't let anyone ever tell you any different. Anyone who puts you down is just super jelly of you and your sparkle. And believe me, there is NOTHING worse than someone who is lime green jello and can't even admit it, so you're welcome you're already winning :)

You don't have to be the best at everything. Don't listen to Abby Lee Miller, second is NOT the first to lose. As long as you did the absolute best that you could do, you're already winning.

Be involved in society! I mean how are you supposed to find out that you actually love doing yoga if you don't take a class, am I right???? The best way to find out who you are, and what you like is to be involved!

BE LOUD AND BE PROUD. Go back and read that sentence again except this time scream in your head, unless you read it out loud then scream it out loud as loud as you can! Voice your opinions, let others know what you're thinking. No matter what anyone else tells you, you're opinion DOES matter!

Never give up on yourself. Not even for a second, not even for a half a second. Nobody should be able to change who you are except for yourself. But keep in mind you should also never change yourself for anybody. Change because you want to change, not because somebody wants you to change. If there is one thing in this world that is worth spending a lot of time on, its finding out who you are, and not giving up until you do. Don't get discouraged. As I've said before, nothing great in life comes easy, and nothing easy in life comes quick.

Xo~ Mandy

Your Impact On The World

I remember it like it was yesterday (even tho it was in fact a little over 2 years ago) I was sitting in my college English 101 class. It was my first day of freshman year and I was TERRIFIED. I was no longer a big fish in a small pond, I was now a small fish in an ocean. As I sat in my seat (which i might add was not assigned because the cool thing about college is you can pick your own seats!!!) I held my sparkly pink pen ( come on you knew that was coming) in my VERY clammy hand and waiting for my professor to come in. As he walked in I studied that man from head to toe trying to see what kind of person I would be dealing with every morning for the next semester. As he strolled in glancing over every student, he had a look in his eyes. And you know the look I'm talking about. It was a "they have no idea what they're in for look" He dropped his bag on the table, looked me straight in the eye ( because having a last name like Yates got me a permanent spot in the back corner all through high school I decided to take it upon myself to have a different perspective of a classroom and sit in the front for once) and he said "What is your purpose in life?" At first I didn't know what to say, because I didn't know exactly what my purpose was. I figured I must have a purpose because why else would I be here if I wasn't meant to do something. And then it hit me, and I said back to him :I want to change the world, one step at a time."

I want to do something big. Like, really big. Super big. Grandé big. I want to do something so huge and so positive that I become something more than I ever thought I could be. I want to be recalled, and talked about. I want to make such a big impact that our descendants look back  and say "I want to be like her!" I want to make an immediate impact too; I want to enlighten people. I aspire to be the reason people want to get up in the morning. I'm on a mission to make a difference. 

I know I'm only 20 years old, and most would say I haven't even experienced HALF of what life is going to throw at me yet, which is very true. BUT, I do know a thing or two about how to be happy, which is half the reason I created this web page in the first place (the other half with this being my homework) and in my short 20 years of living, the biggest lesson I've learned is if you're not happy with your life, or something in your life you have to change it. You're probably thinking "wow easy". Others would say differently. YOU have to be the one to change it. That's the catch. Nobody can change your life like you can.

“Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.”
Maria Robinson

BELIEVE ME, I know what it feels like to want to go back and start everything over. To want to reverse time and make a few changes. Or to even just relive a few things. Unfortunately, that isn't exactly the way the world works.  You can only move forward. if everybody could just turn their negative energy into something positive this world would be full of rainbows, unicorns, smiles, and be an all around much happier place :) Get rid of all the negative vibes in your life and replace them with something wonderful! Instead of sitting, pondering about the negatives, we should all rejoice and be grateful for all the marvelous things life has to offer us! And for goodness sake if you don't like the way something is going in your life, change it! If you don't life the color o your hair, dye it another color! If you're getting tired of your hand bag, homegirl go out and treat yo' self to a new bag! If you feel like you're surrounding yourself with people who are kiling your positive vibe, drop those eggheads and get yourself some positive noodles in your life!!!

The point of very lengthy post in particular is part of my goal to make a difference. I'm not looking to change the whole world in one day. What I am looking to do is make a difference, even if I only impact the life of one person per day/week/month/ect. I'm perfectly okay with that. Nothing great comes easy and nothing easy comes quick. I'm also here to tell you nothing is impossible. Do what you love to do, even if you may think its impossible, make the impossible, possible!

In the grand order of the universe, we are all specks. Our lives go by in an instant as far as the universe is concerned. But it is what we do with our lives that make it so special and precious. It's how we treat others, and how we treat ourselves.

“A year from now you may wish you had started today.”

Karen Lamb

Xo~ Mandy

Things To Be Happy About

Everyone knows its easier to pick out the negatives in life over the positives, I 100% agree. However, life is all about accepting challenges. I personally feel that instead of sitting down pondering about the negatives, you should rejoice and discuss the things that make you happy!

Below I've posted a short list of just 8 minor events that make my life super happy, enjoy!

• The first warm day of the year. There is nothing more exciting than the feeling of throwing your uggs into the back of you closet and being able to permanently (for 4 months) be able to take out your cute dresses and sandals. (Unless you live in New England where you never know whats going on with the weather am I right???)
• Eating cookie dough.  Don't get me wrong, I love nice, warm, fresh baked cookies as much as the next person, but if eating cookie dough is wrong, the I absolutly don't want to be right.
• Eating birthday cake. Now I know you can't sit here and honestly tell me you have never gone out and bought birthday cake to eat. Oh you have???  But wait, here is the catch, was it actually your birthday??? I'll be completely honest, I just bought a cake yesterday and it was not my birthday! But shhh dont tell my mom! She would tell me "too many calories"
• Breakfast food. Breakfast for breakfast, breakfast for lunch, breakfast for dinner, breakfast for a snack! You can never go wrong with some waffles and bacon no matter what time of the day!
• Cute elderly couples. Nothing makes my heart warmer than seeing elderly couples still together after so long and still so in love! Sometimes I just want ot run up and hug them and congratulate them on all they have accomplished TOGETHER. It gives me reason to believe true love is still alive.
• When a stranger compliments you. There is nothing I love more than someone complimenting my hair/makeup/outfit/etc. I feel like screaming "YES THANK YOU SO MUCH YOU HAVE NO IDEA I SPENT 27 MINUTES OF AGGRAVATION THROWING CLOTHES AROUND MY ROOM TO MAKE THIS OUTFIT HAPPEN GOD BLESS YOU" but then I remember I wouldn't want them to take back the complement and replace it with saying I'm weird or anything. So I just say "Thank you so much" and walk away while internally screaming (and of course tweet about it)
• Waking up in the middle of the night and realizing you have more time to sleep. I dont care how much time I have. If I have to be up at 7am and I wake up at 6:56am, you can bet your bottom dollar my butt is going back to sleep for those 4 minutes.
• The sound of the icecream truck. No lie, as i sit here typing this, I'm also currently humming the tune of the icecream truck.

Its the little things in life that matter

Xo~Mandy 

A Letter To My Future Self

 "Some people are old at 18 and some are young at 90...time is a concept that humans created"

Reminding my older self the importance of maintaining your youth.

Dear Future Mander, (if people still call you that)

First off, I wanted to congratulate you on not dying. Wikipedia tells us that in the United States a person faces 22 “micromorts,” or units of risk that measure a one-in-a-million probability of death, per day. I’m not completely sure what that means, but I do know that it’s pretty impressive. Life is kind of dangerous, and sadly you always have been accident prone.

Are you still a picky eater? You know what its like being a server and no one wants to serve a middle aged woman chicken fingers at a restaurant so please tell me you have broadened your horizons a little bit.

So what color is your hair now? Still experimenting with the funky colors that require you to use very expansive color vibrancy shampoo? Or did you finally go back to a natural color? Remember the time you thought you were dying your hair purple and it came out fire red? I hope you're still internally screaming about that one.

How many pets do you have now? Come on, you knew that one was coming.

Please tell me you've finally been on vacation by now. Paris? Mexico? Florida? If not then I'm strongly considering saying that your weekend trip to Six Flags when you puked all over the parking lot at six years old lot finally counts. But at least tell people you went the the Six Flags in New Jersey so no one will know you've never traveled farther than Rhode Island. Treat yo' self and go on vaca please, tysm.

And, for the love of God, I really hope you learned how to loosen up a bit. If you die from a stress-related illness, I'll be so mad at you.

The picture on the left was taken on March 20, 2016. Twenty year old you. The picture on the right represents the future you, because you never know what the future holds. I hope you never settle for anything less than what you deserve. I hope you always strive to be the best you can be. And I hope forty year old you can still take pics worth 103 likes on Insta like twenty year old you could.

I'm rooting for you, I always will be.

P..S. Stop eating so many chicken nuggets.

ily mucho,

Xo~ Mandy

Read This

Ever have one of those days/months/years/centuries that are (pardon my french) just kicking your butt? I'll be the first to admit it, working 40 hours a week, while being a full time college student, and still maintaining to dance three days a week can be stressful (disclaimer, I am not trying to brag about my hectic life in any way, shape, or form).

So I just wanted to share five of my favorite quotes that help me get through some rough times. Sure, some words on a piece of paper may not impact your life in any positive way the first time you read it, but if you read it a second, third, even a fourth time and let the true meaning behind those simple words sink in it may shift your perspective in a different direction, and to me, that's when it is all worthwhile.

This is probably my all time favorite quote by a very inspirational woman:

Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius and it's better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring- Marilyn Monroe

To be a star, you must shine your own light, follow your own path, and don't worry about the darkness, for that is when the stars shine the brightest- Napoleon Hill

My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive; and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor, and some style- Maya Angelou

You were put on this earth to achieve your greatest self, to live out your purpose, and to do it courageously- Dr. Steve Maraboli

Xo~ Mandy

Find Inspiration

Have you ever really had a teacher? One that saw you as a raw but precious thing, a jewel that, with wisdom, could be polished to a proud shine? Lucky for me, I was fortunate enough to stumble across a rare precious gem. My high school Food and Nutrition teacher, Carolyn Gloster. Now I know what you're probably thinking, "Really, a foods teacher? Did she teach you healthy foods to eat?" Actually, yes she did, along with where to find healthier foods, how to make healthy foods a little more appetizing, and how to save money when purchasing your weekly grocery shopping list.

Aside from my foods class, she also taught another class held usually three times a week either in her classroom, or by the 500's hallway bathroom during her hallway duty. No grades, nor tests were given out, but you were expected to learn. Some physical tasks were asked to be done such as decorating the board outside her room every month, coloring the "pin the tail on the princess" paper for her daughter's birthday party, and helping to bake for various school events. You could also do dishes for extra credit.

Because there were no tests, there also was no final exam to be taken. But, you were expected to leave her class and proceed out into the world doing great things. One of these great things is this webpage.

This class had only one student, I was that student.

If you're familiar with the book "Tuesdays With Morrie" by Mitch Albom, you're probably aware this sounds alot like it. Mitch's Morrie Schwartz is my Carolyn Gloster.

During your high school years you spend alot of your time trying to figure out exactly who you are, and what your purpose is. I don't think I would be the person I am today if she wasn't there to help guide me in the right direction. She taught me that not everyone you meet in life is going to love you, heck they might not even like you. You have to show them why you deserve their attention. She taught me to be myself because there is no other person like me, so I should embrace myself and my quirks. If you're lucky enough to find your way to teachers such as Carolyn Gloster, don't ever take them for granted because they may just be your ticket to finding out how amazing you can be.


 "I just know you will do great things, even if they seem small now, they still matter to someone and that's what is so great!- Carolyn Gloster

Xo~ Mandy